General Chat

In those days, just like today, people knew other people who lived miles away from them and they probably walked or rode to do their courting. In those days you could walk several miles to and from school and work. I have had people who wed in a church but lived on opposite sides of the county.

Just nowadays, people stay in contact with emails, buses, cars, trains, internet etc if they live miles apart to meet up.

I'd be more interested to know how many people DIDN'T have any illegitimate births in their tree. I rather think that attitudes during the early 19th century, particularly in rural areas, were similar to those of today .

Yep deffinately got illegitimate in my tree, come to think of it my own children are illegitamate, we have been together for nearly 15 years and had 2 children but never got married.....oh the scandal, lol.

Karen x

My g gran suddenly moved from Suffolk to Dorset between 1891 and 1901. In 1901, gg grandparents suddenly have a grand daughter living with them!!
Unfortunately she died aged 7.
Meanwhile, in 1901, g gran was working in a hotel and future g grandad was lodging nearby.......... - he had moved from London to Dorset......
By 1902 they had moved to Southampton.
They had 9 illegitimate children before they married in 1924, when g grandad's first wife died, and 1 legitimate child who died aged 4 - and who I am named after.
I love my Gloucester lot. 1871 census - Hannah Evans, confectioner (widow) 2 children, Hannah Evans and Henry Evans, with a lodger, Samuel Doutch. 1881 Census - Hannah Evans, confectioner (widow) 3 children, Hannah Evans, Henry Evans and Mary Doutch Evans (my gg grandmother). Hmm I wonder who the father was!! (I like your sweeties Hannah) lol
My dad was illegitimate too - and when gran was alive she was hardly helpful as to his parentage - though we were, at least, certain of his mother!!!

maggie

My grandma was amazing - truly stunning. Whenever my mum asked how long she had been married it was always "I can't remember".

She was married twice, I should note, once to the father of my uncles who she left for a mysterious man who became my aunty's dad (although they never married).

Then, she goes to work at the place owned by my mum's dad, got pregnant and didn't marry until six weeks before my mum arrived! (She never admitted it - I found out with a bit of help from a relative on this site who located the marriage reference.) No wonder she "couldn't remember".

Equally curious is the family of a great-uncle by marriage. His grandma had an illegitimate baby in her early twenties, then married a Mr. Dawson and had some more children (though I have never located Mr. Dawson on a census with her). Meanwhile she takes in a "lodger" named James South. Her children swap between the names Dawson and South and on one census the whole lot of them are the "South" family - I know it's them, they never moved out of Grantham.

Makes you wonder, were the girls so keen to get married that they agreed to have sex with their boyfriends in the hope of falling pregnant and insisting on marriage to "catch" their man? With there being no contraception you would think they would be more careful but I wonder how many couples in our trees either married because the bride was pregnant or they thought they'd got caught out (even if it did turn out to be a false alarm)?

my dad was adopted as a baby
this l knew but last year l found his bc
so l have been tracing his mother in the hope of finding a photo of her
l have traced and been in contact with several members of her family but no one has a photo
she didnt have any more children but married a major after the 1st ww and moved to his home town of Braunton in Devon
l am currently trying this area

l only want a photo of her

Mine is in Sussex too. My 3Xgt grandmother was a servant at Ashburnham, when she fell pregnant at the age of 12 or 13 (!) to the Earl of Ashburnham (or one of his sons - we will never know for sure). This story comes down through 3 separate lines in the family, who had no previous contact with each other until I started digging. The story goes that some men came in a carriage to take the baby away and have him educated, but Judith refused to part with him. The baby boy eventually became the gamekeeper on the estate.

xxxxx mick

Several on my tree mostly from Sussex. My 2 x great grandmother for one.Another 2 x great grandmother, married my 2x Great grandfather in kent had 3 children, appears to have run off with the family lodger ,had two more children [base born] lived in Hull for a while as a common law wife, returned to Kent married again under her maiden name [1st husband still alive] no divorce.No children with this one outlived him and ended up living with her married sister.

I have quite a few.

My half-sister was born out of wedlock. Her father married someone else while visiting family in Ireland before my mother had the chance to tell him she was pregnant. His name has never been revealed and probably never will be.

My mother's mum was also born illegitimately, as was her mother before her. I will never know who the fathers are as the mothers moved to a different county and didn't marry until several years later to someone from the place where they were living.

My paternal grandmother almost was. Her parents married in June 1899 she was born a month later.

My eldest daughter is though I did marry her father two months after she was born.

My grandparents married three months after my mother was born,
My great grandmother had a son before she married my great grandfather, and no name for father on birth certificate, but on this son's marriage certificate the name of her husband.
We wonder if he was the father, or whether this was done to save face.

my father and his half brother..neither knew who their fathers were / grandma clara has a lot to answer for.....sussex again .

Hi Teddys

Was your great grandmothers son baptised under his mums name or the husbands name, because he probably was the father if he baptised her as his.

Also, due to there being no birth control, a lot of men did get younger women pregnant and if they travelled several miles to see their female friends, they wouldnt leave without nothing as we say.

If someones wife was ill or away, then often the man would pay around. At least mine admitted paternity, which must have taken a lot of guts.

Arrrr - they were a loose living lot

our Sussex forbears!


xxx mick

My gg grandma (on my dad's side) Jane Brogden had 4 sons and never married.

My g grandfather was her 2nd child, and he was named Arthur Blackburn on his birth cert, a name later used as his middle name, and later still dropped altogether.

So maybe Jane thought Mr Blackburn was going to stick around and marry her but then never did.

Jane is one of my favourite people on my tree. She worked very hard bringing her 4 boys up on her own and I imagine her to have been a strong no-nonsense kind of woman, as well as a bit of a character.

I think I'm also grateful to her for not marrying in a way because that's what's given me the name I've always been proud of.

Maria x

my gr gr gr grandma had 3 children and never married,the names of the fathers are all differant and the first name began with a w as did the surname.so i think she just made them up.

my gt Grandmothers baptism record says Caroline fille illegitime de Sophie Matthieu nee 12 et batisee le 29 Juillet 1832
I think it has a better ring to it than illegitimate daughter

In 1835 there is a baptism record which say Ellen daughter of Lucy Blunt reputed father Jonathon Butterworth
Ellen took the name Butterworth
They were both teenagers at the time and eloped to Rochdale and got married a few weeks later
Lucy and Jonathon are my Gt Gt grandparents

Yes, why is it that quite often when the mother and father of an illegitimate child married shortly afterwards, they moved to a different area of the country before tying the knot?

Several people including me have had this happen.

Ben

So back in the 60s all the babies with out dads had so much in commom with the generations before them but it was looked upon as shame now almost everyone has kids out of wedlock and nobody bats an eye

I have just traced the errant father of my two x great grandmother on this site "A2A" it came up with his name and details of the maintenance awarded, 2/6 a week in 1820 . As I had got a result I then tried another one and also got the details, warrant for an arrest and another maintenance order although this last couple did marry 2 years later.
These were both in East Sussex but it covers all areas. All I did was type in the mother's surname.Then went through several possibles, only took a couple of minutes to achieve this, so its well worth a try.

My Dad! So no fathers side to look at for him. He is 79 now, still hurts him not knowing. There was once his mum told my mum his dad was an American. But no one knows who he was.