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Confused - should I be happy or sad.

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ProfilePosted byOptionsPost Date

Pamela

Pamela Report 5 Mar 2008 13:00

Just found out my late father had a sister born some 5 years after him who only lived for a few days. Nothing was ever mentioned in the family about another child. As far as my father was concerned he was the youngest of four children. There has been no mention of this child and as my father and his three other siblings are all dead I cannot find out anything about her. Just don't know whether to be happy that I have found an aunt or sad that I didn't have any idea she existed. Anyone had the same experience.

Victoria

Victoria Report 5 Mar 2008 13:19

Pamela,

Well at least you have found out about her now- she is still part of your family even though she died and can still be part of your tree. My great grandparents had a little girl who died a few days following birth. My nan told me it was a boy!! I found a record that I thought it could be but was a girl I sent for the certificate and low and behold it was her.

I don't think my nan's siblings descendents know this but I am definitely going to share it with them!!

BW

Jane

Pamela

Pamela Report 5 Mar 2008 13:26

Thanks for that Jane. I'm sending for the death certifcate to see the cause of death. I'm certainly adding her to my tree.

Regards Pam

LD

LD Report 5 Mar 2008 13:29

Pam, yes I have experience of this. My mother never really spoke about her family but when I researched them I found 3 teenage deaths and a shooting !
You can understand why sometimes they don't tell us everything.

Pamela

Pamela Report 5 Mar 2008 13:34

My dad was very young and he probably didn't notice anything. In those days this sort of situation was probably kept from the children.

egards

Pam



Sandra

Sandra Report 5 Mar 2008 13:38

I had a similar experience with an aunt my mother knew nothing about.

She was never mentioned as far as we know...my mother certainly hadn't heard of her.

She was born in 1900 and died at just 2 months old...poor little mite.

I like to think I've 'found' her and I have her in my tree with her family.Her name was Lily.

It seems surprising to 'find' lost babies,I think,because nowadays we keep the memory alive.We have photo's and other memento's to remember them by.Yet going back, folks were told to try to forget the tragedy...pretend it had never happened.

All the best,

Sandra.
xxx

Pamela

Pamela Report 5 Mar 2008 13:46

Thanks Sandra

Yes she is now in my family, her name was Kathleen. She was named after my grandfather's sister.

Regards

Pam

Joan

Joan Report 5 Mar 2008 14:47

I found out similar a fortnight ago. My grandfathers brother had 10 children. The first 6 died very young and the last four survived into adulthood and married.
Only by cross referencing with a buriel plot and details from the church did I know that the info I have had for years was my family.
So sad but they are now on my tree with their siblings.
Joan

Julie

Julie Report 5 Mar 2008 14:49

I found out when i was younger that my mum had 3 children before i was born..2 were still born & the other lived for 4 months, but do you think i can find anything, i did speak to my mum about it not too long after i found out, but she said she didn't know what i was talking about.

Victoria

Victoria Report 5 Mar 2008 14:59

Julie,

The stillborn children will probably be on the seperate still birth register but you should be able to trace the other child.

Good Luck

Jane

Southern Jo

Southern Jo Report 5 Mar 2008 16:49

My g grandmother had 14 children; only 4 lived to adulthood. I have been so pleased to be able to find out the names of all the little lost ones, and to put them in their rightful place in their family tree. They are not forgotten anymore.

Wendy

Wendy Report 5 Mar 2008 17:40

Hi there, can anyone help me ? Ive only recently found out too that my grandmother had 2 additional sisters born between her brother and herself (1887 - 1906) one of the siblings, Mary L Slaughter was aged 1 on the 1901 census and on speaking to my Aunt, Mary died between 1906 and 1915. However I can't find neither a birth or a death for her ? Ive looked on the 1901 census online, Freebmd and familysearch.org but don't know where else to look. Im probably being completely thick... Help please !!!

K

K Report 5 Mar 2008 18:02

Wendy

Where do you think Mary was born and it would help to have the names and ages of her siblings/parents. There is a possible birth below but it may be better to start a new thread

Kayx

Name: Mary Elsie L Slaughter
Year of Registration: 1900
Quarter of Registration: Oct-Nov-Dec
District: Steyning
County: Sussex
Volume: 2b
Page: 252 (click to see others on page)

Wendy

Wendy Report 5 Mar 2008 18:08

Hi Kay, thanks for your help.

Mary had a brother Charles Victor who was born in 1887, not sure about the next one but Florence Lily was born in 1905.
Parents were Charles Slaughter and Miriam Hemsley. Funnily enough I had trouble finding the marr cert for my grand parents who were married in Brighton but the records showed Steyning - so you might have hit the jackpot ! As im relatively new to this, would I know have to obtain a cert from the GRO or would you look at a Parish register from say the Brighton/Steyning registry office ? Thanks Kay, sorry to be a pain :)

K

K Report 5 Mar 2008 19:07

You can buy a copy of the birth cert online from the GRO for £7 and this looks like the family in 1901

Name: Charles V Slaughter
Age: 3
Estimated Birth Year: abt 1898
Relation: Son
Father's Name: Charles
Mother's Name: Miriam
Gender: Male
Where born: Brighton, Sussex, England

Civil Parish: Brighton
Ecclesiastical parish: Brighton St Martin
County/Island: Sussex
Country: England

Street address:

Occupation:

Condition as to marriage:

Education:

Employment status: View Image

Registration district: Brighton
Sub-registration district: East Brighton
ED, institution, or vessel: 28
Neighbors: View others on page
Household schedule number: 88
Household Members: Name Age
Charles Slaughter 21
Charles V Slaughter 3
Miriam Slaughter 20
Mary L Slaughter 1






Julie

Julie Report 5 Mar 2008 19:19

Jane,

Thank you..I have look but can't see nothing, i was told my an Aunt (Mums sister)..My Mum was 17 when she married me Dad and had my Brother at 21, i didn't say in my 1st post i am 1 of 3

Julie x

Deborah

Deborah Report 5 Mar 2008 20:01

Your posts put me to shame.

I was told when I was much, much younger that I had an elder sister (I was told her name and what she died of) who died very young before I was born. This fact was completely forgotten by me until I recently started researching my family tree. It was only on Sunday, Mother's Day, that I remembered their was a girl born before me. I asked my Mom about her and was given the date of birth and date of death, she was 4 months old.

I was also told when I was younger that my Mom had a brother who died after a awful accident when he was 11, agian I was told his name and what the nature of the accident was and again forgot all about him until Sunday, I also asked my Mom about him, she remembered his date of birth and date of death.

Both this sister and uncle are now on my family tree where they belong.

Teresa With Irish Blood in Me Veins

Teresa With Irish Blood in Me Veins Report 5 Mar 2008 22:46

One of my Dad's sisters, (Stella Pauline Slade) had an only child who died at birth...or so I was led to believe...the family never talked about it and I had no idea if the baby was a boy or a girl.

I spoke to my eldest cousin back last year about it (she's only 10 years younger than my Dad) and she rememberd that the baby was a boy and the year he was born.

I sent off for his birth and death certificates. He lived for less than 24 hours and died the day after he was born.

His name is now in my tree where I can remember the poor little mite...my cousin I never knew.

He was named Michael Paul..bless him.

Kaz in a Tizz

Kaz in a Tizz Report 6 Mar 2008 00:19

Hi Pamela and everyone

I have an older brother Stephen who only lived for 6 hours and I can't find a birth or death for him - even after all this time it is so hard for mum and dad to talk about him so is difficult to ask questions.

Kaz

Ang J

Ang J Report 6 Mar 2008 17:40

hi wendy i have some slaughters in my tree from steyning
angela