Genealogy Chat

First I would like to thank everyone for their help especially Lynda,Rosemary and Maxine. Without their help I wouldn't have got this far. Now to get to the skeleton. I had been trying to find my gandfather's father and on the 1881 census it said that he was with his grandfather at that time. I had his marriage certificate, left to me by an auntie, and on it it said that his father was Robert Richardson a shoemaker by trade. I sent for this Thomas's birth certificate and received it this morning. It seems that the reason Thomas put Robert on his marriage certificate ,(who was his grandfather), is that he was born out of wedlock. Margaret, his mother, was unmarried on the 1881 census. There is no father's name on the birth certificate. It looks like my mother was not a Richardson, but now we will never know. That avenue is now closed. Just thought I would let all you kind people know the outcome. Thank you again May

How frustrating for you May..I have great sympathy for you. Keep smiling.. Claire

Thanks Claire. I remember my mother saying that he didn't drink during the week but on a weekend sometimes he would come in, a little worse for wear and say "I met a man from Brampton" . I think, perhaps, that every time he met a man from Brampton it might have been his father. I feel terribly sorry for him. May

Hi I think this is quite common because on my g grandmother's Mary Esther Drinkwater's birth certificate her mother's name was Hannah. I thought i had the wrong certificate because i knew her mother was definitely Esther Drinkwater. I later found out that Esther's Mother was Hannah and Hannah signed the birth certificate because Mary Esther was born out of wedlock (now I am confusing people) It was actually the registry office that contacted me because the signitures on both certificates are the same. Roseanne

Just a thought Mary but could you try and find his birth or christening in the Parish records? Sometimes a mother is mentioned. John

Thanks Roseanne and John. That's an idea John, will try, May Sorry didn't reply sooner been having my dinner

Hi May Sorry you've hit a brick wall. Is it possible that Margaret married the father later? as this often happened too. That's the problem with the proverbial "skeletons", by the time the stigma has gone away, there is usually no one around to pass on the information. Probably your grandfather's family knew exactly who the father was - it's such a shame. Thank heaven that times have changed. Maxine

I also have a skeleton in the cupboard. I searched for ages for my grandads parents, finally found his mum on 1901 married, with her children. She had my grandad and his brother before she was married. My only clue to their parents was both of the brothers middle names were Stephenson. Probably their fathers' surname, but who knows??!! Maggy, West Yorkshire

Hello May. If I read what you have put correctly, then Margaret although unmarried was a Richardson. The name will therefore come down the line and your mother is correctly called Richardson. For Margaret, we had a similar problem but it turned out that our errant lady had used her mothers maiden name as the middle name for her son. We blamed everyone of that name in the district before we sorted it out

Thanks everyone for your thoughts. Keith. If Margaret had married she would have changed her name to that of her husband therefore my mother would have had his surname and also Thomas would have had his surname. I can still research the Richardsons as this was a maiden name. I think I am due for another cup of tea on this one Keith and maybe a couple of bickies as well. This researching is very complicated at times but SOOOOOOOOOO !!!!!! interesting. I guess I'm hooked now. May

Hi Maxine. It is possible they might have married later. Margaret, Thomas's mother is on the 1881 census but she disappears on the 1891 census and her 2 sisters with her. Thomas is still there though and he is 13. All very confusing. May

Hi Margaret Looks like you are in the same boat as me. We can't get any further there. Isn't it frustrating. Gosh I do wish I had asked more questions when my parents were alive. May

Unless adopted by the new, if any, husband Thomas would retain the name of Richardson - how would that work out

This is sooo interesting. Plus useful lessons to learn! Thanks Kathy

Hi Keith, Thomas kept the name of Richardson so the maiden name is coming down the line instead of his father's name.There were 6 children including my mother who carried the maiden name. It's all messed it up a bit, and although I can still research the maiden name and it is a blood relation it is still not the right surname. Oh well, that's life, you can't win em all. May

Same thing here too. Finally received my husband's grandfather's birth certificate and the mother wasn't married, so we have the maiden name too. Sad thing with her is, she was in the workhouse when he was born, her parents brought up the child and she went away to work, married, had about ten more children and died 20 years later. It makes me wonder if he ever knew anything about his mother or was she just forgotten by her parents. Yes things have certainly changed.

Michelle, That is so sad. I was sorry for my grandfather but that is such a sad story, being in the workhouse. May

Hi May, I too had a skeleton. My grandmother was "adopted". So we found out when she died. My Grandmother was born in 1910 to a 16 year old girl, father unknown. We found she has 2 other half sisters and a brother all in their late 70's now. They have welcomed us with open arms, as they too didnt know she existed. It was scary at first contacting them, but they were so open and loving it was amazing. Isn't it interesting to note how not a lot has changed over the years, having children out of wedlock. It was done then as it is done now. I would like to be able to tell my grandmother that it was ok she was born out of wedlock. She's still my "nana" no matter what. Anyway May, welcome to the "Skeleton Club". I look at my "skeleton" as being a new beginning. Hope you will get some good out of it too. Good Luck, Jenny PS My nana's name was May....what a great name

My nan refused to tell anybody when her wedding date was, even to celebrate her 50th wedding anniversary. Lo and behold, after some secret snooping I discovered it was about three months before she gave birth to my dad. If she feels she has to lie about it, even when her kids were (just) legitimate, imagine what the mother of an illegitimate baby felt.

Hi Jennifer and Katherine, It looks like we have a skeleton club here. As you say, it would have been nice to tell them it didn't matter to us. May