Genealogy Chat

Again this is not about a "child's" rights or any issues between parents. This is about being aware of people's feelings and treating them with care.

Namelessone - I agree that it is for the family to tell their own children anything they feel they need to.

Exactly Sue.

Too much is made of people's 'rights' these days.

With 'rights' comes that word RESPONSIBILITY.

People sometimes forget that.


I have made contact with a new found cousin of my husband's. I introduced myself and explained a little bit about the family.

The person has not replied.

I do NOT have the right to bombard him with further information if he does not wish it - even though I am very interested in his background.

Cynthia I feel the same about my cousin who I mentioned in my opening post. I would be very happy if he answered my message or accepted my invitation on FBook but if he would rather not have contact with me then that is his choice. I certainly won't hound him. His adult children are also on FBook but I will leave them alone too.

Same scenario here Sue.......are you sure we're not after the same chap??? :-D

You never know Cynthia :-D

Very thoughtful thread.

Thanks, Sue

I didn't think of using FB ............. although I am not sure if I will, as I like to preserve my privacy, and I know rellies who are on there are not very careful of what and how much they post.

I'm extremely careful what I say to them, as I don't think they have even the first level of security!

I'm also not sure I want to chase Uncle Tom Cobley and all .................... my ancestors had large families, moved all over the place, and most have had no contact with any others for several generations (or about 150-200 years!).

.......... unless I could be assured that I would find a billionaire hidden in there :-D :-D


I also believe, like Sue and Cyn, that too much is made of people's "rights to know" over-riding the rights of others to preserve privacy.

In some cases, that could be translated into just plain nosiness, or liking to pass on gossip.

Although I do maintain that all of us who do genealogy are blessed (or cursed) with a large dose of nosiness. If we weren't, we probably would not spend so much of our time delving into other people's lives, and wanting to know what our ancestors had been up to :-D :-D


Good luck, Sue and Cyn :-)

Thanks Sylvia :-)

I haven't as yet received a reply from my cousin but I will be patient.

On the other hand I have had some very nice "chats" with my "new" nephew :-)

Thank you Sylvia. Each time I open my emails I hope to see a reply but........ :-(


I agree with the curiosity/nosey comment as I would love to be able to fit my chap and his family into context but, as with Sue, I do not have the 'right' to force anything on him which he may not want to know.

So, again like Sue.......I will be patient. :-D