General Chat

Thank you everyone for such lovely and supportive messages for my friend..... Mandy - yours in particular sent me off on one yet again!! It is so perfect that I've printed it off so I can show it to G. x

Thoughts and prayers to you and your friend. So sad Germaine x

Thoughts for the family

Jill so sorry to hear about your friends and their baby, what a sad story. Thinking of you all xx

That is very sad Jill. Sometimes even Doctors don't get things right, so until the baby is born I expect that they cannot be 100% certain as to how badly disabled she'll be. I too have a 'problem' they think I was born with but it has not stopped me doing anything. Only your friends could make the decision whether to carry on with the pregnancy or not; it is such a tough, individual decision which no-one else should judge; I feel it is always up to the individual, only they can know how they'd cope in such a situation. I wish them all well & hope that despite it's disability the baby brings them all the joy they deserve. Joan xxx

Jill, I am thinking of your friend and praying that they will have the strength to cope with whatever problems they are going to face with the new baby. I am sure that he or she is coming into the world for a purpose and will brings his or her own love. One thing is certain, no matter how disabled the little three year old will love it unconditionally. ann Glos

that is so sad. I have a friend that went through a termination at around 22 weeks. Although that was a decision made by her and her husband that was a terrible ordeal in itself. At least in this day and age with medical knowledge as it is your friend and her baby will get lots of specialist treatment. Lets all hope that something can be done to help the little mite after the birth. Thinking of them Claire x

Jill I'm so sorry to hear this. Can I share a little story with you, it might help to comfort you a bit tonight. A friend's sister gave birth to a baby who was found to have Down's. She was low risk in all respects and hadn't had any tests done, so it was a complete shock after the baby girl was born. The mum was so distressed and in shock that she even contemplated going home from hospital without the little girl, but she couldn't go through with it. At the baby's christening, the godfather stood up and said that having a child with a disability was like having a holiday and ending up in a different destination. You book to go to Italy, you're really looking forward to going to Italy, you buy things for your trip, you read all the guide books and you're going to have a fantastic time. But when the plane lands, you find yourself in France. Surprised? Maybe shocked? Even disappointed? All sorts of thoughts going through your mind. But then you realise that this holiday is STILL a holiday - just a different one. You will still have a wonderful time, you will still enjoy France, but in a different way to how you would have enjoyed Italy. I hope I've explained this properly. Love and hugs Mandy :) xx

Sorry to hear that Jill, my thoughts are with them XX

Jill it is very sad,but that little one will still bring a lot of love and i bet they will love (him or her)as much as there other child.Must now think positive.I wish them a lot of luck.Annie

they and u r in my thoughts and prayers xxxxxxx

Oh Jill - what a sad tale......... Your friends will undoubtedly find strength to cope with this that they never knew they had. They will love this baby unconditionally for however long it's life be - and they will without doubt receive the same love back from their baby. My thoughts and prayers are with them. ANd (((HUGS))) to you darling xxxxxx

How sad to find out so late in her pregnancy. Send her my best wishes , Rosalyn xx

Thanks Wendy........I read your response in the totally wrong way......x

thoughts and prayers to you and your friend. tina x

Thank you Fi......as I said to you in my private reply....the doctors cant even be certain that the baby will even survive the birth......and for her to be offered a termination at such a late stage, to even have to consider that as a possibility is devastating..... She has other health issues herself that I wont go into, but I hope and pray that the outcome wont be as hopeless as the doctors are suggesting to them....

Jill, no-one has thought you meant that for one minute, honestly.

Every life is a value....that isnt disputed.....if I have inadvertantly worded something wrong in the first place then I apologise......I am gutted for her having to be faced with this at all, or anyone for that matter....if she didnt value her baby's life then she would have chosen to terminate......

I have pm'd Jill, and her, her friend and the baby have my full support.. Let me just say one thing. Being born disabled does not always mean an individual cannot lead a good life. I am almost 38, and have been disabled from birth. Yes I use a wheelchair, but I live independently, drive and work full time. With support of friends and family it could be possible. Fi x

maybe its me but how can the hospital offer that when shes carried her child so long , shes found out all these probs and then offered a termination, someone didnt think of her feelings there did they, my heart goes out to her and her hubby, i hope they can remain strong through this, hope also things are not as bad as thought when baby arrives, ill be sending thoughts for a positive outcome