General Chat

I had a phone call from the hospital a couple of hours ago. Phil has been vomiting. They think it is the novovirus. Some of the other inmates have diarrhoea (sp?). I was asked not to visit for a while. I certainly dont want or need it.

Hi all.

I visited Phil this morning. He seems to be settled in all right in the private hospital, and is walking a bit better than he had been a couple of weeks before he went there. Previously I had been hoping he would die soon as it was so piteous to see him, but now I dont mind if he lives a long time, even though it will mean lots of visiting. But once a week will be enough. I do have a life of my own to live.

Huia.

Huia, hope you are beginning to feel the benefit of not having to worry about Phil every time you want to do anything. Time to think of you now.

Where is everybody?

I have been down to Rotorua for the long weekend, for a Choral Festival. I put up a thread about it as some of the others wanted to know how it went.

I might visit Phil tomorrow as I havent seen him for 10 days. Not that he would have noticed my absence probably. That is one good thing about Alzheimers, I can get on with my life and 'neglect' him and he wont go crook at me when I do visit.

Bob, I hope you and BH are well and you are behaving yourself.

Huia.

Hi Huia

Neither was I in the Girl Guides.
(I can still remember my elder sister wanting to dress my brother and I, at a very early age, in her clothes. My reply was "I don't want to be a dirl"). Obviously my language was as backward as my spelling.
But then again I was not in the scouts either. But I certainly agree in forward-planning. I am currently in the midst of that as far as our future accommodation needs are concerned. Perhaps a retirement village which has ongoing care for BH. Never thought of myself as a village person. I do not know whether the "villagers" would be able to cope with my sense of humour.
Without a squeak of objection from me, until I am placed in the box myself, I have to be considering those changes which we had both done considering the needs of family during our earlier lives.

Regards and best wishes

Bob

The social worker has just visited. She phoned the hospital to ask how Phil is. He has settled in but apparently is not speaking. I presume the brain connections to speech have been damaged though I could be wrong. I still have that annoying virus so might not visit him before I go to Rotorua on Friday but I will ring them anyway.

Huia.

Yesterday I visited a funeral director to ask a lot of questions, rather than waiting until 'the time' comes and possibly disolving in tears or forgetting something. I will talk about it to my son at the weekend so he knows what I have discussed and found out, re organ donations etc.

I wasnt in the girl guides but I do believe in being prepared.

Huia.

Evening Huia
My MIL was the same as Phil when she lost her teeth she refused to wear them again, saying they hurt. The nursing home tried to get new ones made for her , but pointless and would have been an expensive waste as she was adamant they would hurt. Oh well she managed to eat a little without them. She also lost glasses and again wouldn't wear them after. Somehow she coped.

I hope you do have enough income to live on Huia. You shouldn't need to struggle now, when things should be getting easier for you. At least you are coming into your summer now.

It is getting much cooler here now and some areas have had frosts already.

Hope you have a good week.

Linda :o) XxX

I delivered the clothes to the hospital yesterday. Phil was asleep in his chair after lunch. He looked awful, mouth open, no teeth (he hasnt used his false teeth since he lost them for a few days in the other hospital and then when they were found he complained that they hurt.)

On Saturday I got a letter from WINZ saying they have been informed that he is now in a private hospital. A form was included for me to fill out for the Living Alone Allowance, although my super has now gone up almost $50 a week. Phils will no longer be coming into our bank account. I hope my super plus L.A. will be sufficient to cover insurance, rates (but I will be eligible for a rebate), and the other big expenses. Our savings will be used to partially pay for the private hospital. Maybe I will have to give up using the internet! (No way).

Huia.

I went shopping yesterday for some Bob Charles type t shirts since the hospital prefers them, plus track pants. I found 6 shirts in the op shops (too expensive to buy new and I dont see the point if he is liable to pop his clogs any time). Only one pair of pants, but he already had 2 pairs and he can have one of my old pairs. Now I have to sew name tags on them all. That should keep me out of mischief today.

Huia.

Huia, with an OH who has been on insulin for 43yrs, I have some experience of low blood sugar. The easiest way to describe it is to think of someone drunk. Somw get belligerent and others get silly, and it can vary with the degree of low sugar. High blood sugar doesnt seem to show except in tiredness. Regular blood testing at home and sticking fairly closely to the diet avoids these things.

Yes, Bob, and when I had my eyes tested for new glasses a couple of months ago I was extremely surprised to be told I had dry eye. I dont see how I could as the tears still flow. At least the ointment I have for the conjunctivitis seems to be working. The eyes are still a bit red and itchy but nowhere near as red and sore as they were on Sunday.

Huia.

Everybody has heard of the "Bucket List" now. I had not of the term until I had seen the film with Jack Nicholson.
Sharon your experience gives a bizarre and imagined picture of what could happen when the list has no bucket.

Here is a reason carers need to get out somewhere,if only to a lonely place where they can scream loudly.


The equipment service have just tried to deliver to me a commode........WITH NO BUCKET!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


This will be why carers are stressed!

Oh Bob.Carers need cars.
I took over my dad's.Only he could drive the little heap.I couldn't make any sense of the carburettor and neither could anybody else.

Have recently done scrappage,what a palaver because I never re-registered it and now have a diesel Smart.

It means I can nip out,even to go down the harbour and look at the mud for half an hour.It helps to stop me being quite so stir-crazy.Sometimes just going from A to B is as good as going from A to Barbados (unless you live in Barbados of course!)

Oh dear we are all packing up! Had an email from a relative who had been quiet for a week or two, to say that she had had swine flu' as had her husband but were now both on the mend. Pleased that we are all on various levels of "on the mend".
At the moment we are driving around a little like "Driving Miss Maisie" in our old 1970 Austin 3 litre. I am sure that some children cry when they see it coming, others with the same warped sense of humour that I am blessed with, think it was a designer's joke at Austin to stretch a mini. However it is getting us from A to B but I draw the line at expecting it to get us from Y to Z. On one website I looked at had the comment, "Austin 3 Litres. Are there any left?" Have been researching the market for as much car for as little money, thinking that they may take my licence away in a year or two, so something that lasts a few years with not too many Kms on the clock will do. My current preference is a three year old Toyota Avensis. Now what has this got to do with Carers Anonymous? Not a lot except to currently get us from A to B and further down the track possibly capable of getting me from Y to Z.
With all the recent tears flowing I would have thought that eyes would be resistant to conjunctivitis but that does show how much I know about the condition. Maybe I should not have said that tears were good. For all I know too many tears could cause the eyeball to tear. Just joking again about a non-joking matter.
All the best to all

Bob, have you got a replacement car yet or are you too busy looking and haggling to come on here?

Huia.

My friends husband has been diabetic for many years and he doesnt follow the rules as he should. She has had to call for an ambulance several times. She told me recently that he hits her when he is getting an attack and his doc thinks he has had some mini strokes. I just hope she keeps herself safe.

I have been googling organ donations. I was surprised to see that kidneys and liver and skin are acceptable at all ages and corneas up to the age of 85 (though Phil would have only one that might be accepted if he doesnt have a cataract in it which I think he might). I had hoped bone donations would also be acceptable but there is no mention of that. The Auckland Medical School has a brain bank so I hope they will take Phils brain for research or for students to practice on. I know he would appreciate it, we were down as organ donors on our driving licences.

Huia.

Hi Huia, I hope Phil settles down ok and you get the finances sorted out easily. Hope you end up with enough to live comfortably and to do what you want regarding driving to your choir meetings and such, would hate to see you have to hold back from getting out to see people and visit Phil.

You are probably best not visiting him till he is settled in anyway so make the most of the chance to get a bit of rest. I hope your eyes and throat are better soon. I had a sore eyelid for a couple of days and then yesterday it came to a head like a stye which I bathed in hot water. Went to the pharmacist to see if I needed to use ointment or something but she said no, just keep bathing it and it should clear up on it's own, but now it seems much more sore and the other eye doesn't feel 100% so I thought a while ago, maybe I have conjunctivitis! Now Huia, I know you thought I had passed something on to you the other day but I am surprised how fast the conjunctivitis might have spread back to me! lol

Let's hope you, DET and I can soon see more clearly again.

Take care, must get to bed in a bit, have been watching my two smaller hedgehogs feeding again and time flew by, they were so funny as they snuffled away, one kept butting his head at the other one to deter him from eating the best bits of catfood etc.

Love and hugs to all you carers O.h. has a fasting test this morning to see what his blood sugar levels are like, were a bit high before we went away. I am so hoping he is not diabetic as I know he won't stick to the rules!

Lizxx

I have just received the phone call to say that Phil has been shifted to the private hospital. I wont be visiting for a few days as I still seem to have a virus that is going the rounds. After breakfast I lay on the settee and slept soundly for almost 4 hours, despite a reasonable nights sleep. My eyes are still a bit red and itchy and my throat is not right yet.

I must make an appointment to see the woman at WINZ (work and income NZ) to sort out our finances. They will be taking his super and putting me onto a living alone allowance and subsidising the hospital.

Huia.