General Chat

Just looked Chrisa and see they have put names and dates of births on there as well..................worrying I think.

I know I have contributed to this thread, but now is my time for evening meal etc. I'm not ducking out of it, and would be very pleased if it was still current on the boards tomorrow.
Have a good evning all, bless you.
Julia in Derbyshire

I saw this thread earlier & I've been thinking about it since.
I feel very uncomfortable when I see requests about living people.
There have been a lot of requests recently from th same person on records asking for marriage look ups fpr the 1940's right up to th 60's. There is another one up now & this thread made me think about why this same person needs so many 'recent' marriages?

Well I thought I'd ask.................I wouldn't know where to start.

I know I have some cousins who never knew they were part of a large family, but would never dream of finding them to let them know.........they might be thrilled.........or devastated that their loved one had not been totally honest with them.

Either way, it's not for me to open a can of worms.

Many ways, Kitty. Dozens at least :-)

As a matter of interest...............when someone is trying to trace living relatives who have been adopted or simply moved and no contact can be made, are there any other ways of contacting them?

Just thinking it might be good to include some information on starting points on this thread.

If not.....................ignore me:))))

Sally that's a good point and thank you for bringing the subject up. I hadn't given it a thought. I've never helped anyone that way and I am so glad I haven't.

Thanks for letting us know.
Janet

Yes Eldrick, I remember that. The onslaught you recieved was rather insensitive, and uncalled for. You were, after all, being kind-hearted.
Julia in Derbyshire

Yes Sally, please do. I would really like to see a positive outcome to this. Also, if helpers see this, I hope they realise that their enthusiasm, whilst well meant, just might be a little misguided. And please everybody, don't take offence. My concerns are not meant to offend anyone, because you do fantastic work.
Julia in Derbyshire

Eldrick knowing the sensitive soul you are I'm sure you were mortally hurt! lol :D

I would leave it for a couple of hours, as there will be some disagreements with you later on, I'm sure.

I recall mentioning, albeit perhaps too bluntly for some, that a poster had given out too much personal information.....the wrath of the gods was invoked! The thread was continuously nudged with more and more information on it....lol....I was called worse than a pickpocket and it was sooo upsetting...lol


But I applaud your sentiments and 100 % agree!

I think what I'll do Julia is copy and paste my original post into Word and then if it disappears too far down the board to find I'd just put up the thread again. What do you think?

Good move there Sally getting in touch with GR. I have been wary when I have seen these posts in the past, and am becoming quite concerned at their regularity. Some may be very innocent, but some could be very sinister. I hope something is done. Perhaps this thread should be constantly nudged up the board to bring it to the attention of others,and have it foremost in their minds when thinking of helping people
Julia in Derbyshire

Following on from your suggestion about T&Cs Julia I've been in touch with GR to put that to them. I think it's something that should be thought of and also maybe have something in the tips for using the boards about not looking up living people for posters you don't know at all.

There is another one of these type of threads on TTF, wanting to find some stepchildren. It gives childrens names and mothers', and say they live in Derbyshire. What if they lived next door to me, lived in my street etc. What would I do? Perhaps GR should have some new T&C to cover these type of threads.
Julia in Derbyshire

I think newbies take the GR advertising at face value, when it says join GR and find people, and they are looking for family........I feel sorry for them, but hope that sensible members put them right tactfully about putting personal details.for all to see.....

Poor lady and her daughter, what a way to have to live, being scared that someone is after you to do you harm........scar the kiddie for life I should imagine.....

Well said Sally.
I do hope everyone reads this and takes note
Ann
Glos

hi sally, some men/women do it for control, domination and putting fear in their victims.... not nice people, and they always come across as the lovely sweet next door neighbour, you could trust your hamster with.... :(
stalking is just as bad.... :(
i to hope the lady finds safety and help..
kaz xxx

They just do sally and will go to any lenghts to find who there looking for ,Its a sad fact of life!! and the effects of it last for years .So I hope many read and learn from this .

Oh I have no beef with her doing what she has to so her and the child keep safe Toria. My anger is aimed at the (in this case) man. Who the heck does he think he is and why does he feel he has the right to terrorise this lady and her family?