General Chat

Prento, I agree that is what the site is all about.

We help and share.
I shared my husbands tree with a relative of his on here.
He was the grandson of my mother-in-law.
He then was able to catch up on his tree looking at mine, and rewarded me by finding another TWO GENERATIONS of the tree, taking us into the 18th century..... he didn't have to do that, but he PM'd me and sent me the information.

We all have to give and take.
Good luck with your tree.
Deanna X

I have shared information on my tree with someone who has a connection three generations back, simply because going back further we are researching the same branch of family. Since then we have been in constant touch by email and have pooled our resources, so to speak, but getting as much information from sources available to us, collating it, and (finally making connections and working out where families have crossed more than once) added names to both our trees.

In other words, I had contact with this person who only had one name in connection with mine..and me with her. Together we worked on that branch of our trees and between us have confirmed and added several more names over about four generations.

I was contacted through another site I belong to ,a one name study site, by the son of a Canadian Home child.
he saw my reply to one of the postings and thought we had mutual family . His dad is now passed away but he didn't know anything about his family, before he put in Barnardos ,aged 8, other than his parents names his maternal grandfathers name and that he had a sister who was also a home child. His dad had got his Barnardos file and was able to find his sister in Canada but knew nothing about his past..

I was able to confirm the Grandad was my grt grt grandfathers Brother born in the 1850.s and i had extensive history on that side of the family.

I sidetracked onto his family getting his parents marriage cert and his birth cert , his grandparents marriage cert as well.

I added it all the my FTM and backed it all up with copies of the certs ,Census records . parish relief order copy of navy records for the ancestor who joined up aged 12 in 1798 .etc. and sent it all to the son . He was overwhelmed with all the History and only wished his father had still been alive to see his family history.

Didn't cost me much, only a few extra certs, and time in collating it all in addition to what I had got on my FTM. plus the cost of postage to Canada When it was received i was told it was like having a massive Xmas Present they were so overjoyed
It gave me a warm feeling to know i had helped out a family member we still in contact and address ourselves as cousin.
We don't own our ancestors they had other family as well i feel once a cert is bought why not share it ,why pay for another copy when i have it already . i have had others share with me.
However rudeness isn't acceptable but maybe they didn't mean it to sound rude .
Shirley

I was contacted by a member of another site who had a boxful of info re a child of my grt grt grandfathers' sisters family, due to the children being split up after death of their mother one had been adopted into a family miles away and the info escaped being thrown out several times. I have had this passed to me also with details of her life and family after adoption.

So thank you to that person and I could have so easily dismissed their request for my info. not realising at first the connection.

Frances

I would help anyone who had a connection to me -the trouble is I cant find anyone lol!
BUT rudeness is never acceptable at any time !
Angie x

Prento, I'm sure if you hang around long enough, someone else will insult you !!

The point is, one person may have done a lot of research on a tree...but if someone else is beginning to research the same family don't they deserve a little help?

It's THEIR family too.

When I first joined GR about 3 years ago, I was just starting out. I actually joined here for what I thought the main purpose of the site was -- to meet as yet unknown family members.

I met two nearly right off the bat, by searching trees, before I'd put much into my own. They are both people with whom I share a set of grx2 grandparents in England; one of them is in England and one in the US, and I'm in Canada. The one in the US especially has approached this much like me -- looking for family, having been cut off from roots by emigration. Not just looking for names of dead people to put in a tree.

We've exchanged info -- in the case of the cousin in England, it's been pretty much one-way, as far as ancestors go (hello, Brian in Essex!). I've done the same with other distant cousins met since, both here and through Ancestry, e.g.

But in most cases, our interest in contact has been personal rather than academic. We wanted to meet people with whom we share family, to get to know them as much as to exchange historical information.

If that was what your contact had in mind, Prento, I can certainly understand the response. If the person was a newbie like I was -- just kinda thrilled at finding a family member -- that kind of reply would certainly not have been expected, and would have been a little hurtful.

I've become very friendly with several distant cousins met through this research. It's great to have someone to share discoveries and breakthroughs with, whether theirs or mine. It's also just cool to get to know the people who share my ancestors. I would have thought that most people feel that way.

Perhaps it's me but I always let people see my tree if I think there is a connection and then I ask them to let me know if they think we connect, I don't care if people want to copy my tree, I get fed up if they don't have the decency to acknowledge me but I have had some great people send me stuff and it makes up for those who can't be bothered.
I would not put up with insults or upset though sent to me when I have done my best to help
Janet

this site is about sharing

some really nice people helped me

when i was a newbie

and i will be grateful to them forever

nobody knows everything not even you

one day their tree might be

bigger and better than yours

and i hope you dont ever ask them for help

your attitude sounds very male to me

us girls share much better than boys

you got it Joy!!

One of the biggest thrills I got was contacting someone on here to tell them that their Grandmother was in my tree, only a side line of my main tree .The place of birth they had was wrong.Their rellies told em I was wrong , but they sent for the birth certificate an the info I gave was correct, it meant they could carry on with their family tree .. I spoke to them on the phone ........ absolutely brilliant !!!!!!!!! i will always be happy to share whatever I find ...
I love this hobby .
:))))))))))) Kim xxx

and you Kim!
xxxxx

i also had a wrong person on my tree

i worked full time for months

on this person

right name wrong person

somebody else pointed this out to me

we investigated together

and became really special friends


so anybody who needs information

from middlesbrough

i will be more than happy to help if i can

A lot of what is said is true and good advice. But often there are Hot Matches and Tree Matches which don't match.

Recently I was pmed about two families in general, no names and no dates. I replied asking for names and dates, which I didn't get. Only a message saying he had already opened his tree for me. It took me half an hour to sort out who was on his tree and who was on my tree. Our trees did not match. But I would have been saved a lot of time and effort if I had been given a specific reply. I did not open my tree for this person! Nor would I, unless the information is specific.

Having said this, it is wonderful to meet up with long lost relatives, regardless of the information they may or may not have.

Last Rememberance Sunday was approaching and I discovered that a great uncle had been awarded a medal. I was desperate to contact a second cousin. He was her grandfather. I had been trying to contact her for two years. Eventually, on Monday 12th, I found her and told her about the medal. She didn't know about it. But it was great to hear from her and from her part of our family.

Swings and roundabouts! Win some and lose some! And there is never any excuse for rudeness!

i know what you mean about doing all that hard work and then someone comes and copies it but..

i think you have to be willing to share to get thurther.
i found a cousin of my partners on genes who he hadnt seen for about 25 years,,, me and my mum arranged to meet her which we did when she saw me and i said her name she flung her arms round me and kissed me on the cheek which was a bit of a shock as i,m not related to her...

we went for a coffee and she had 2 albums of photo,s which she told me who they were one was my partners father wen he was about six grandparents grt grandparents even a picture of my partners fathers brother who died wen he was about 18months old .... my partner didnt know his dad had a brother... then she told me to pick what photo,s i would like to have and she would get them copied for us which she did ..... what made it all the more special was my partner never saw his father he died wen my partners mother was 6and half months pregnant with him...

i,v shared loads of info with her ..
and we know were our daughter gets her looks from she gave us a photo of his grandmother wen she was fourteen and our daugher who,s fourteen now she her double..

you just never know were things can lead

WELL SAID DONNA XXX




SEE HOW SHARING

WORKED FOR DONNA PRENTO

Not read all the threads ...
but if someone could have saved me a few hundred pounds by giving me the info that i needed i would have been well made up.
So aslong as someone has direct line with my family tree then i would be happy to share .
Thats what this site is all about .
As for being rude then that is not on .
Rosex

When I first started I found tracing my family really hard. A very kind man open his tree for me and sent me loads of stuff in the post. Lots of it being what my family used to do, just daft stuff. He helped me so much. I wish I could be this helpful to someone else. We all try to help, but its personal preference as to what we give to others.

well if thats all what you call an insult,or got,

*what are you doing on GR then*

its not far off from being true,,,,,,peope are much more insulting &rude than that,!

! isnt that right folks,!!

and if you were demeaning to them that their tree wasnt up to your standard of research ,perhaps they are better off to do their own and not bother trying with you, Prento,