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Insulted

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ProfilePosted byOptionsPost Date

Laura

Laura Report 1 Mar 2008 09:02

Yes Dianne that is lovely- I always open my tree to someone with a genuine connection... dont see a problem with it.
I have made some brilliant friends, and reunited family member who havent seen each other for years, some meeting for the first time ever!
I am always willing to give people any information I have, because I dont believe that I have the right to keep someone from knowing about their family. If I can help in any way, I will.
In the same way, the people who I am in contact with are now willing to help me too- we organise it so that if there is a cert for a shared relative that needs buying, we take it in turns to pay and send copies to each other- therefore halving the cost!
It wouldnt have hurt to share at least some names and dates, then they would have been able to search for census etc themselves. at no point should the person have become abusive, but I expect they were feeling hurt, as I would have.
L xxx

♥ Kitty the Rubbish Cook ♥

♥ Kitty the Rubbish Cook ♥ Report 1 Mar 2008 08:54

Dianne................that is lovely :))

xx

Dianne

Dianne Report 1 Mar 2008 08:50

I have recently had contact with two ladies on here. Their great grandparents are brother and sister to my great grandma. One of them opened her tree to me.

I don't keep any family history on the computer at all as I don't trust computers, but I am currently typing every last scrap of information I know into word and I will be e-mailing 400 years of information to these two ladies as soon as possible.

For one reason.

They are my family.

Dianne xx

♥ Kitty the Rubbish Cook ♥

♥ Kitty the Rubbish Cook ♥ Report 1 Mar 2008 08:16

I can understand your contacts frustration, but that is no excuse for rudeness.

I would wonder why someone was unwilling to exchange any information with me too.

Because your tree has more in depth information than theirs does probably means they are in the early stages of compiling it.

Would it have hurt to give them at least a couple of names and dates etc?

xx

ஐ+*¨^¨*+e+*¨^¨*+ஐ Mildred Honkinbottom

ஐ+*¨^¨*+e+*¨^¨*+ஐ Mildred Honkinbottom Report 1 Mar 2008 07:48

Prento

You can ask genes to block someone from mailing you should they be abusive via pm.

Being on Gr is partly about sharing info though although not compulsory.

if the other person had info you wanted, such as four of five names, dates and places. would you have still withheld your tree knowing you have much more names & info on it that they diddnt have ? Or would you have shared your info ?

Or what would happen if they had names you badly wanted and refused access to their tree because their tree was bigger & better than yours ?

It is frustrating should you be on the other side of the coin.

What I would have personally said to the person concerned, is that you dont open your tree fully but are willing to give a few names and dates such as parents names, or the next names in their tree sequence. That way they have to find out all the other details themselves.

skwirrel 1

skwirrel 1 Report 1 Mar 2008 07:46

I only have a small part of my tree on GR, the in depth tree is on my computer and will share only the line of my family that is being asked about.

skwirrel

°o.OOº°‘¨Claire in Wales¨‘°ºOO.o°

°o.OOº°‘¨Claire in Wales¨‘°ºOO.o° Report 1 Mar 2008 07:43

I'm also reluctant to open my tree & risk having ALL my work copied however I never go back to a contact & send them absolutely nothing.

Would it have hurt you to send a few words of encouragement & a small amount of information?

However, getting insulting messages is not acceptable, if you conact GR they can block this sender.

Penny

Penny Report 1 Mar 2008 07:42

i should imagine they feel pretty hurt too
Do you share a relative? you mention 3rd great grandfather.

Thje included their tree ,maybe intentionally,and because there was nothing of interest to you, you wont tell them anything else?

yes, I would wonder why you belong to GR too

sharry

sharry Report 1 Mar 2008 07:37

I haven`t been insulted but but I don`t share details with anyone who hasn`t an obvious connection. Sometimes it isn`t wise to give too much info (even though living relatives can be hidden) and I admit some people assume it is their right to view your tree

Brett

Brett Report 1 Mar 2008 07:31

Hi everyone,
My first insult since being with GR. I was contacted out of the blue by someone who introduced themselves as a relative. We've all been there. The person in question asked about my 3rd g-grandfather and included (by mistake?) their family tree. I quickly checked their tree and there wasn't much on there of any interest and certainly nothing as indepth as what's included in mine and what's taken me years to compile. I thanked the person for their contact and their tree but the information they had provided was of little use too me and that I was reluctant to provide information relating to my ancestors considering the cost and time outlay. Well since then I have received nothing but insults. I was asked 'what I was doing on GR if I wasn't willing to share all my information'. Quite odd as I have meet many wonderful people and have shared a lot of family history. There are some I am a little reluctant to provide information to. Has anyone else experienced this? I'm pretty easy going and have helped countless 100's researching their own family but to have someone insult me in such a way makes me wonder if maybe it's too easy for people to stay in contact and whether we should have an option to 'block'.

Any thoughts and have any of you experienced the same thing. We all know how this works and why we do and don't provide family information.

Cheers,

Prento