Genealogy Chat

Kate

I compose text messages in sentences ---with punctuation. My daughters find it hilarious. But I can't help it.
Welcome to my world.

Pat

That's a good point, Peter, although as a relatively young person myself, I think I must be old-fashioned - I'm the only person I know who composes text messages in sentences.

The other thing is, maybe people forget - if they use a lot of message boards - that message boards often get a quicker response than an e-mail. I sent a text message to someone because they sent me one late at night - I expected they would answer it more or less instantly as they had just sent me one. They replied much later telling me off for not asking how they were - with text messages you can easily fall into the trap of expecting an instant response.

And some people also shorten their messages where other people would write longer ones - I often get e-mails written in text message speak and it drives me up the wall.

I use a similar format to Gerry and always try to end with a question as I find this is more likely to bring a response. There is a word for phrasing questions that require more than a simple yes or no, but I can't think what it is.

If I've heard nothing after a month, I usually send a follow up, wondering If they have had the chance to look at my original message. No response after that I delete the contact and don't waste any more time.

Do remember though that not everyone logs into GR as regularly as some of us, and if they don't have the GR notification service enabled, me be quite unaware that they have a message waiting for them.

As far as the "curt" replies are concerned, consider that they may be from a younger person. They think nothing of emailing brief one or even half liners to each other all the time.

Or when you give them a lot of information, and the 'ball is in their court' to sort out their branch, and you see that they have not troubled to take up the information given.

Yea I know what you all mean! I always reply to people who respond to me and always thank them, even if there's no link. Some people are just plain rude!! No manners!!

'It's nice to be nice'

'Always treat others the way you would like to be treated yourself '.

I tried being friendly again, and asking if it would be possible to view the person's tree as they gave an indication that there might be a link. I got a one word answer 'nope'. Makes me want to write back and say "ahh...sorry I just realised, there can't be a link because my ancestors had manners....something which obviously doesn't run in your blood line!"

Makes you wonder why people join these kind of sites. I truly hope I am not related to the likes of this fool!

People are people, some are not as communicative as others, some may take ages just to type a sentence - unlike people who are touch typists!

Generally, if I get a rude reply I think well, shant bother with them again and do hope they werent related to me.

Whenever I contact someone whom I think will be a possible match, I always start "Hi [insert their name]" then give some brief details about who I think may be the match, year of birth, place, parents, siblings etc. Then I ask if they think this could be a match for their relation in their tree. I tell them I'm looking forward to hearing from them, finish with good wishes and sign off.

It makes me so frustrated when you get back a short response like "no it's not" or "don't think so' or "could be" or "yep". That tells me nothing helpful at all. I try sending another message, and yet again get a short curt response. Why do these people bother if they don't want to find out more, or is it that they now know everything and don't want to help others?

Some people are pure hard work!