Genealogy Chat

I am reeling from an unprovoked 'attack' in a message to me regarding a request to view my tree. I have been accused of going against the ethos of Genes, of taking information and not giving. Why? Because I queried that on the information given there was any connection. The surname being searched is a common one in the county and from the information given their was no link (wrong area, partners etc.) Therefore I messaged to ascertain if there was any more information that made the inqirer think there was a link. Not only was the message aggressive and rude, it was also not very helpful, not giving any more information. I was then going to give access, if it was THAT important! But i can't because the person is not on my contacts list so i assume it has been removed. please be polite, it costs nothing, I was already upset over the death of gaynor, now I am doubly upset at having my integrity attacked. Ann glos

Hello Ann, I think you can rest assured that YOUR integrity is totally intact - please don't allow some smug idiot to upset you - keep your chin up and hope that a connection DOESN'T come to light further down the line - who would want to have a connection to someone with an attitude like that! all the best Val

Thank you val, feeling a bit upset about it because i am more than willing to help everyone. Ann glos

When will people learn that manners DON'T cost anything... Chin up Ann, we know you're worth your weight in gold xxxxxxxxx

We are here to help each other , to question and to querey - this idiot obviously hasnt got a clue.. bet dont want to be related to the anyway!! chin up chicken Jess

Ann please dont be upset. I think some people are just a lot more easily riled or indeed, less sensitive than others and I dont doubt that I have been guilty of giving the wrong impression when perhaps I am in a hurry or upset over something else. Life is too short (as we are only too aware at this time). Brush this off - it really is of no consequence. God bless.

thank you, your replies mean a lot to me. ann glos

Ann no one who has been the recipent of your kindness would have no doubt that you had the best of intentions asking for some sort of proof, as why should anybody be able to view your tree just because they want to sorry if this sound mean but I too would want to know details before letting anybody who hasn't already proved some sort of connection to somebody in there Love and hugs to you Ann keep your chin up love Lara xx

Ann A similar thing happened to me yesterday. They were certain we were related and when I queried it they got all stroppy and with a name like Clark in London I'm affraid, like it or not ,I will continue to ask who were the parents(of the Ancestor). It's a reasonable question. Doing a tree costs a fortune...manners cost nothing. Don't let them get you down because you did nothing wrong Sheila

Hi Ann, It's sad but there are some who just want to collect names rather than have a real interest in Family History. You did the right thing and with good manners. Gwynne

luckily it is not a person that I have come across much on the boards. I have put it behind me and hope it doesn't put me off responding to queries on my messages. Ann glos

Ann Anyone who acts like that dosent deserve a second thought.

Ann, I am so very sorry, that was awful. I hope you never hear from that person again. We are all here to help one another, manners costs nothing, and that person should be ashamed of his / herself. keep your chin up, Joy

I think this person can't know me very well. The membership number is 7 figures and starts with 4 so a fairly new member. not that that is any exxcuse for not being polite. Ann glos

I have seen the message that was sent to Ann and I am truly disgusted. Thank goodness that rude people like the sender are in the minority on this site. I had the privilege of meeting Ann recently, having been in regular contact with her for some time now, and I consider her a true friend. She is one of the nicest people on this site, always polite and helpful, never getting involved in messy situations that occur. The sender of the message is an extremely ignorant person, accusing Ann of things that we know she would never be guilty of! Particularly on a day like today when we are all so very sad at losing one of our precious friends and GR members, it is regrettable that somebody has to act like this. Ann - you are worth so much more than this person! Love and hugs, Mandy xx

Thank you for your advice frank, much appreciated. Ann glos And Mandy, thank you for what you said.. i do appreciate it. Love & hugs Ann

Ann, Can I just say I echo all the nice things said in reply to your posting? This is a decent website for decent people hopefully and anyone who is genuine in wanting to find their relatives will be touched by your letter. Sorry to add to the strand of postings but I was sufficiently moved to read your posting. Jonathan, Surrey x

Thank you so much jonathan. ann glos

I do find it strange that someone who had so much to say has not come forward to defend themselves. strange world!! Ann Glos

HOPEFULLY Ann because they now realise they've not done the right thing, being rude to you. You did the right thing and if they were genuine they'd have given you more to go on. As was said earlier, don't give the person a second thought. It would be a waste of energy. Chin up. Jan :-))