Genealogy Chat

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In the last week I have had messages off 2 different people wanting info on ancestors in my tree. Although I do not open my tree to them I have given them details they need ie marriage details, siblings, parents and grandparents. I have been waiting for a reply off both of them. And Im still waiting! I must admit some people on here do reply with a thankyou even if there is no link..But some people!!! It drives me mad... Am I on my own? Sara

I agree, a simple thank you doesn't take long. However, I think that some of us with regular access to the internet, sometimes forget that some people only log on occasionally, i.e. once a week, once a month etc., so maybe you will get a 'thank you' at a later date. I hope so anyway. Kath. x

No Sara, You are not on your own, I have sent scans of birth and marriage certificates and not had a thanks, very annoying, but have to content myself with the fact that most people do say thanks. Fuzzy

hiya, no you are not alone, on my second to last lot of hot matches i had two different people, message me, 'can i see your tree???' and ' did joe bloggs marry ada smith???' Now if anyone thinks i'm going to give in with requests like that they are mistaken. I did message them back and asked them what kind of information are they after, and if I could have a few names i would check if they were in my tree and get back to them, Guess what??? NO REPLY, you cant help some people, manners dont cost nothing, take deep breath and count to ten keep smiling Julie

hi all,i agree with you it's so easy to say thank you it does'nt cost anything, it's the same when you send a message to someone who you know is related to you and they dont anwer, it makes my blood boil lol hazel.

Thankyou Thankyou Thankyou Thankyou Thankyou Thankyou ThankyouThankyou for all of your replies!!! Wow that was easy! Lol Sara

HEAR, HEAR!!

sara can we have one more please for an oncore lol hazel.

I so agree with everyone here. I have become very cautious too. I always untick the box to view my tree when emailing. I too have sent numerous documents to someone very keen to view them and then nothing. No acknowledgment, no reply. I have left it a few months and tried again as I have a contact who I know is linked to this person. They have emailed them. Nothing. I always try to be polite, to reply to emails even if not connected. It only takes a few minutes. On the other hand there are some lovely people on this site who are so very helpful and kind and I am forever grateful to them. Pam.

I can't imagine not saying thank you for something that is so valuable to me. aren't people strange? or do they get distracted and forget? Ann Glos

I've had a mile of help, both on the boards and through email,after finding names in the searches. I have always sent a 'thank you'. Reading these replies has made me feel better about it, because I sometimes felt it might annoy people to have to open another email just for a thank you. Now I'll keep doing it.

Maybe if you put RSVP at the end of your mail, there are still some that wont respond. Rod

Over the last couple of weeks i have posted a few tips replying to questions,and expanded on the answers via PM. This morning i have had two messages with the results that the members have discovered.While they are not connected to my tree,they both share an area and time period with my tree. Sometimes just knowing that your ideas have helped someone and knowing that something good has happened is better than struggling away with your own brickwalls. Glen

What I especially like are the people who demand. You know, something along the lines of 'Contact me if you have Ann Brown in your tree'. In these instances I simply don't! (There hasn't been a connection either!!). Victoria

I always remember doing a cenus lookup,got what i'm pretty sure was the right person (name of son,father and mother matched,father had the right occupation etc,but son was consistently two years adrift from his age via marriage cert). I saved four images and had to ask for the correct e-mail addy three times to send it.Only then did i get a message to say 'wrong family,son born 1899 NOT 1897,it can't be him he is definately x years on his marriage cert!' Three months went by with no thanks or anything then suddenly i got a message with a very courteous first paragraph saying how fantasticly well i had done with the RIGHT family,and all the birth refs i trawled for were in fact the correct ones,now they need the same for the five siblings,and the spouses thereof. Not 'could i' more of 'you will',sorry but it's one i didn't chase after,i did reply with 'i'm sorry but i can't because of commitments etc',but that went unanswered. Glen

I too have given information out within the last few days, and am still waiting for a thankyou. This concerns two different members. It is just very bad manners. Pam.

Its just plain bad manners. Manners dont cost anything! Susan

Pam, days is a bit unfair. Not eveeryone is as devoted to the hobby as we are. Some a previously stated only check perhaps once a week or so. I start moaning after a couple of weeks. Mid you I had a funny one this week 3 months after I had sent a message I had one back saying yes it is the same family! Pauline

Well the one person came back to me very quickly when he noticed l had someone in my tree that he was interested in, but once i had imparted with the information - SILENCE!!!! Pam