Genealogy Chat

I've recently given birth to a child (it's about 1880) I have to register the birth. ( It always seems to be the Mother!) a) My husband is working. b) I'm not married - the Father has done 'a runner' c) I'm not married but am living as wife with a man and using his name. Do I need to prove that I am married to my child's Father or tell a 'load of old lies' and get away with it? M. Steer

Margaret LOL, From my experience you tell a whole load of lies and get away with it!! Fuzzy x

Fuzzy, Explain your statement. What lies, from your experience, have I told? M. Steer

Hi Margaret, I have had several mothers registering the births of their children and found them to marry the fathers three, six and eleven years later. They had already taken the names of the fathers even though they were NOT married at the time, they had no compulsion about lying these 'strait laced victorians'!!! Fuzzy

I'm with Fuzzy, bluff your way through it with a pack of lies.

Nice one Sue, I dont know how they had the cheek half the time, I obviously come from a long line of sinners!!! Fuzzy

Fuzzy, Be careful, very careful, how you phrase your messages. M. Steer.

Margaret, I was in no way inplying that you were lying, but the mothers that registered the births, as I am sure you realised when I posted the next message.....trying to help you.....there was no need for your last posting....and I am now very offended fuzzy

Fuzzy, YOU are offended!?.... That's rich!... M. Steer

margaret, I am a friendly person who always wants to help people, you cannot have been offended when you read my second posting and realised what I was talking about, you obviously jumped to the wrong conclusion, how can you be offended when reading all my postings, in future I will avoid your postings. fuzzy

Margaret I'm sorry but you are totally wrong to be so rude to Fuzzy. In your own post you say...and I quote: 'or tell a 'load of old lies' and get away with it?' Fuzzy, and I for that matter were only using your own words. You asked what people in the 1880s did to get away with not being shown as having illegitimate children, and we both gave you what we thought they did, using your words. Nobody was accusing YOU of telling lies for heavens sake.

Sue, thanks so much sweetie, I have had so much support tonight via PM's. Fuzzy x

the word 'you ' has been misinterpreted-read it like you as a plural not singular,

Hi ego, You right, but if the second message had been read and digested.......only trying to help.......never again!!! Fuzzy x

its an example of how language on the internet without the tone,expression,and stress on words added can make some sentences sound or read totally different....unfortunate aspect of this mode of communication with all its colloquialisms.

If the poster had used the impersonal pronoun 'one' the rest of this thread would not have happened. It was the use of the personal pronoun 'I' which precipitated the rancour. Reg

Hi Reg, It would never have happened if she had read my second message, when I gave her the example of mothers being deceptful to the registrars. Whole experience has put me off of helping people! Fuzzy x

Hey Snowdrops, Thanks sweetie, I really appreciate that, must admit it has put me off a bit, but most people are so lovely I am sure it wont put me off for long. Fuzzy xx

Don't let it put you off, Fuzzy.........just be selective. I have to say that I understood your responses - the wording was clear, and, as far as I could tell, inoffensive............ Reg

Thanks Reggie, I appreciate your reply and I will indeed 'avoid' people, would love to carry on helping people as it makes me feel part of this big and happy community. after all we are all in the same boat, and it is nice to know that we can lean on each other. Fuzzy xx