Genealogy Chat

I have thought a bit about this before posting and I might regret posting it but I need to get it off my chest. I have had someone contacting me as we seem to have a common ancester on my mothers' side, so I opened my tree to them. I've just popped along to have a look at their tree and they seem to have taken all my info from my father's side that I have worked hard on doing. I haven't worked just straight up on my father's side but researched who each brother and sister married as well, going back to Great Great Great Gandparents, buying certificates etc. Not only that but this person seems to have made mistakes as well in regards to names and dates. It has taken me a few years to get a lot of this stuff including hitting many brick walls because of surname changes. I have now closed my tree to them but it's too late now as they have all the info. Has anyone else had this not so nice experience?

I think most of us have. I dont think there is anything you can do about it. I always find hot matches are one sided - I have years of documented work with all certs and other official/interesting documents and they have grandads name. Next thing you find is all your hard and expensive work is attached to their tree. Its sickening. One person who had only a very vague connection took everything and I found he had entered it on ancestry one world tree - it was a terrible shock to see my fathers name on there as he had only just died. I did contact the chap several times through GR and ancestry to say how upset I was but never had a response. Now I rarely give access and only after I am sure the person has more information than just one name.

One of the first rules I learnt was never rely on other peoples research!Always check up on it. If this person has taken it all, it seems to me that their cheating themselves. Finding the connections yourself is the whole point! what's the fun in just copying someone?

If their info is wrong - how do you know they copied it from yours? They may well have researched as well as they were able. have you tried communicating with this person about ancestors and your findings V theirs? Ann

Yes, the exciting bit is finally piecing together the jigsaw, isnt it Jodi - but then again, if someone presented you with a well documented 3 centuries tree, you cant ignore it can you. Personally Im glad Ive struggled to get my lot together.

I am one of those people thats pinched a tree! Well this is what it felt like, even though the persons tree who it was didn't mind. My Great Gran was a missing link on her tree and when I first started researching her side of the family I discovered her family which was totally unknown to my side. Knowing this person had spent years building up her tree I did feel really guilty about taking the information and it did take the fun out of researching, but I have plenty more branches to go down! and her tree is invaluable to me. Before putting the information onto my tree I did check it was ok with her, which I'd of thought most people would do!

Thanks for your comments Heather and Jodi. I've seen a few hot matches with names that may or may not be the same but until I do more research I don't really get in touch with anyone myself till I know for sure. Ann, I do know they have copied from me simply because there are some very unusual names in my tree, and I was the one who researched this side of the family in the first place and managed to break through the brick walls. Only today I put in a date of death for someone and they have it down as date of birth! This person has a relative of mine down as having a father when she was illigitimate! I have tried asking them where they fit in, but no response as yet. What I don't understand is if someone is most probably very very distantly related to me on my mother's side, why do they have the need to have all my father's side details? Relatives could get in touch with them but there would be no immediate connection for example to my childs father who I am no longer with etc.

Hi Annette, I understand what you mean, I have even got a few more names thanks to contacts, names I didn't even know existed, same as my fathers side, some relatives didn't even know my great grandmother existed so therefore didn't know I existed. But each person I have had contact with has not minded me using their info, but then again I never put it in my tree till I have researched it myself and bought the certificate to be sure. I perhaps wouldn't have minded this person wanting this info but firstly I don't see why they needed it and secondly they didn't even ask me!!!

Hi Shelley, I do know what you mean, I only took the information that was relevant to me and also double checked births, marriages etc. They didn't know my gran existed either or knew what happened to my great gran, so at least it gave them a little bit of information as well. I've only just started out tracing my family back so I've lots of branches to go down yet and I'm enjoying every minute, its so addictive!

What I just dont understand is why people would load a whole tree onto theres when the branches have nothing whatsoever to do with them, not even vaguely. I had one chap contact me - he had over 20,000 people on his tree - I mean what is the point of that? I asked him where my person fitted in and he said, no idea. I didnt open my tree to him- hed probably had 21,000 then.

Isn't part of genesreunited about sharing your tree with others family members and reuniting the different sides of the family. Of course theres nice ways of doing this. I found someone whos tree had photos of my ancestors and she kindly shared them with me. Alas I was unable to share much back so it was very one sided.

Nichola Yes, this Site IS about sharing information with other FAMILY MEMBERS, not the world and his dog. If you are related to my mother five generations ago, why on earth would you want my father's history? You have no blood relationship with him, prior to me.My parents were born in two different countries and the two families never had any previous ancestors in common. In common with many other members of Genes who have been doing this a long time, I have found that 'sharing' consists of me GIVING and receiving nothing in return - that isn't sharing! Of course, new researchers will always know less than other people who have been doing it longer, I understand that, but it does start to get very wearing! You will rarely find old-time researchers saying 'I thought this site was for sharing'. I NEVER open my tree - I got caught too, in the early days and my work is plastered on One World Tree, on a tree which contains over 100,000 names. This tree consists entirely of 'stolen trees' contributed by other people as gullible as me. This isnt meant to be harsh. But I think you will find that your attitude will change, the more research you do, the keener you will be to ensure that it goes into the right hands. Good luck with your research. OC

Yes Nichola part of Genes Reunited is about sharing our tree with other family members, but not, as I suspect, perhaps an in law of a great Aunt 5 times removed and without permission.

OC, You said what I was trying to say, thank you. Annette, You are right it does get addictive. Shelley

I agree 100% with OC I find these days that it is mostly one way traffic with regard to information....Me to A.N.Other. I have absolutely no problem with that and am only glad to be able to help, however when I do give what I have for our shared line I have asked the 'right' questions to know we do actually share the line and I don't use this site to share the info! I have never (yet) had a contact complaining about not being given access to my Father's line....Why would/should they when they asked about a connection in my Mums, or visa versa???? I suppose this yet again brings up the shortcoming of this site, that you can't just open a portion of your tree.....It's all or nothing :( Chris

I wouldn't mind at all if i opened my tree to someone and they used the information on it for their tree - isn't that the whole point of sharing your tree. If you don't want people to access the info then don't open your tree just keep all the info to yourself - simple.

Sue, I dont know for sure, but how much information do you have, how long have you been researching? As O.C. says if you have spent say 2 decades spending time, a lot of money, resources, effort to track down wills from 3 centuries ago or collect bastardy orders from records offices 500 miles away - then I think may be you would be entitled to be peeved if someone with grandads name and nothing else comes along and whips every bit of your work without a by or leave. And the point being, because of that sort of thing happening to us, people like O.C. and myself dont open the trees to anyone unless they show genuine connections and have made some effort to get out and find info themselves. Sharing is one thing - having your whole tree stolen without a word and added to the public domain is quite something else.

thats me told then!!

Sue, I wasnt being aggressive in any way, but when you see your own recently deceased father's details paraded on ancestry one world tree by someone whose name you dont even recognise except for the fact they once asked to see one particular person on your GR tree and then obviously removed every single bit of info on there - you will feel the same as I do, you really will.

Although I too have had large amounts of my hard-won research lifted from my tree, and so I have emotional sympathy with Shelley, O.C. and others, I do feel we should consider that there are differing views as to the scope of 'Family History'; there is nothing sacred about blood-kinship (unless you are a fascist). After all in ordinary life we consider aunts and uncles by marriage as part of our family. If some people want to include marriage and collateral connections then that is their decision. As someone who has had to labour long and hard correcting some prolific and erroneous trees I would rather that my version of family connections (which I believe to be correct) be spread around the virtual world than versions that derive from fantasies submitted to the IGI.